Most of us expect to find love in a ‘traditional’ way, but in this day and age, it can be very hard to listen to. . .
Where are the men?
Ladies, does it look like you go anywhere, you usually see the same men who are now starting to feel like fixtures in a room. As each year passes, the area you live in begins to feel smaller and smaller – as if there is a shortage of men. Banging dolls to go outside becomes less exciting. And, if you add your busy work to the mix, it may seem almost impossible to meet a man. Do not fret. This is why dating apps were created.
Yes, dating apps may seem too robotic in how we meet a man, however, how much does your dating life rely on the ‘traditional’ method? Why do we sit at home and claim that there are never any men till date – but then refuse to take the whole initiative by putting ourselves completely in the dating market?
Getting ourselves fully into the dating market means covering all our bases to find love. Dating apps have become one of those destinations whether we like it or not. Believing that we are ‘too good’ to be on a dating app (or website) or that we will not ‘shorten’ ourselves to be one, means that finding love is not a priority.
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Dating apps are not for everyone, I get that. The good news is that not everyone wants to get married or get married. However, when we are trying our best to find love, and convince ourselves (and everyone around us) that our quest for love has great value — but to use the dating app Sniff the thoughts too – so I question if you are looking for love. As real as you are making it?
There are a lot of men to this day. However we try and convince ourselves that there is a self pity party.
Dating apps are a great way to see more men who are presumably for graves. I am not saying that we will not come in front of the men we see outside too and about these apps – more people are looking for love, then we realize. It can be really refreshing to know that we are not the only people who are wandering alone on this earth. There are many people on dating apps, whom we have never seen or met before, which can restore our belief that love is not as hopeless as we have imagined.
Let’s keep it real, there will be many men we won’t be interested in. This is not a negative thing. There is something great about dating apps: we select men who appear on our smartphones that we can choose from at home – without makeup while wearing comfortable clothes outside. It’s like being in a room full of men that we can quickly scan through our fingers – without grooming ourselves. Hiking (some) and disliking (rest) with our finger swipe no fuss.
Fortunately, when we come across men who do not appeal to us, they are not alerted to this fact.
For all they know, when we do not leave their profile out of our possible matching options, it is because we have not yet come across their picture and mini profile. Although swiping to the left – if we like a man or to the right – if we do not, it may seem like a cold heart to find a man, but the reality is that men do the same for us. Have been.
Don’t get me wrong, sometimes we unfortunately have to deal with emotional dating app games that can harm our ego and heart:
- He makes a contact (or we do- depends on the app) – we ‘app chat’ with him and things start to go well, but then he stops contacting us. (great)
- We go on a date or many — he stops contacting and magically disappears from our app profile because he has removed us from his app. (Seriously ?!)
- He plans a date with us – and he doesn’t show up. (Oh, is that so!)
- We like him and he likes us too – but he never reaches out. (Hmm)
- We like him, he likes us – we reach out, but he never answers. (Actually?!)
- We are a match, we manipulate the chat back and forth, but he never asks us. (Frustrating)
- This is a match! – He plans dates with us, but cancels continuously at the last minute. (Funny)
Also, the men on dating apps are no different from the men we can meet when we are out of town. It is important not to be mesmerized by a boy’s photo, ask all the right questions before meeting him and don’t embarrass him on Google. Remember, if something is felt – it probably is. Listen to your instinct.
Types of people on dating apps (and to date):
- Single men are to be expected
- Married men expect to be separated (but they do not tell us they are married)
- Men who lack confidence in man, but expect their profile to attract a woman
- Narcissistic men who need to know how many women they like
- Men looking for ‘one’ (or!)
- Men who are divorced and want a woman who can raise their children
- Business men or entrepreneurs who do not have time to go out and meet women, but want a relationship
- Serial voters who are not interested in committing
- Men who are afraid of being alone, but are not emotionally ready for a relationship
- Older men who seek younger women
- Younger men look for older women
- Men who are ready to have children
- Men who travel a lot and want a travel partner with whom they can get intimate
- Men who are hunters (beware, they are on dating apps)
- Professional athletes or stars who have a hard time meeting real women
Try not to let this list discourage you from meeting on the dating app. Instead, you empower this list as a pit.
Ladies, dating apps can dip our toes back into the dating scene and bring us closer to finding the lasting love we are looking for. Obviously, not all men on dating apps are going to be a love affair, but, if we remain hopeful and not disappointed, we may find our prince among some frogs.